Yesterday I got the reply from public health insurance – 30 therapy sessions are granted now, if I want to prolong therapy (my therapist plans about 80 sessions) I have to go to a special assessment. I am content with this, with 3 sessions per month I am taken care of for a while with the 30 sessions. My huge fear of authorities nearly (but only nearly!) triggered a panic attack when I saw the letter in the post box. My partner had to open it for me, I felt really stupid because of that but I’m also aware this could be some kind of progress as I asked for help – a few months ago I would have cut und then, numbed by whatever hormones, opened the letter without acknowledging my fear at all.
I hope I can work on this with my therapist so that the assessment won’t be a problem when the time comes (it certainly would be now).
I also got a list of psychiatrists and am supposed to find a contact person – not because I’m supposed to get any meds at the moment but because my therapist wants my emergency contact list to include a specialist and not just my general practicioner. I’m a little worried that it will be awkward to just go there and say “Hey, I’m only here to introduce myself but I don’t want or need anything from you right now!” but if my therapist thinks it makes sense I’m probably just going to try it.
I’m really looking forward to the time when this whole “organisation hassle” is over and I can focus my energy on therapy itself. As for tonight there will just be hot chocolate, cuddling with the cat and watching a nice series. Wish you all a nice rest of the weekend!