Coping

I guess that the way it is right now is coping. I’m far from symptom-free, everday there’s the rage, every hour the thoughts about cutting, every minute the fear of the changes that are going to happen this year. But still it somehow is okay. It’s enough for me that my next therapy session is two and a half weeks away and that I can test my skills until then. I still don’t feel ready to write a post about that topic – I still have to learn more, try things and ask my therapist before I can be sure about the advantages and my difficulties concerning skills. But it is enough. I have enough strategies to do well in the days until the next session. Enough things I can look forward to. Enough time in which I can distance myself from others in order to recharge my batteries.

I can imagine life the way it is right now – I have to consider a lot more things than other people if I want to be okay but I can do that. I don’t ask too much of myself and although I might hurt people because I withdraw even more than usually I feel that it’s good for me to pace myself.
Even if the symptoms are never going to vanish – if I keep making progress the way I have in this short period of therapy this is not just a good start into the new year but also a good start into a new phase of life.

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