…and it goes on: The medical results are coming later than expected, therefore the debrief has to be postponed and my confirmation won’t be signed in time. That means I’m already later than my insurance’s homepage says I should be and even though that’s not my fault the little voice inside my head is telling me what a loser I am if I can’t even manage this.

At work the situation is kind of similar: Standstill as I have to wait for information I should have gotten already and the knowledge that I will be under huge pressure in a few weeks because everything will have to go quickly then.

In situations like this it’s very hard for me to clear my head – although I use everything I’ve already learned I just can’t break the negative thought spirals. I’m counting the hours until my next therapy session on Saturday where I’ll hopefully find a solution or at least a “We will continue even if the paperwork doesn’t work out”.

Just a few more days of staying strong and not starting to act destructively…


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