Cutting due to happiness?!?!?!

Once more I had one of these moments where you realize that you might actually be what people call crazy. I’m alright with my urge to cut when I’m unable to cope with something, angry, empty or scared. What I’m not alright with is that I think about cutting when I’m happy quite often. I mean, what the hell? Cutting is supposed to be an emergency coping strategy – probably not a good one but hey, when I’m really bad and it’s the only thing that works I can live with it.

But these weird moments where I’m really happy about something, for example when I was nervous and then something really awesome happens and I’m hugely relieved…that’s not the kind of moment in which I want my first thought to be: Oh my god, this feeling’s so strong, I have to get a blade immediately! Mind you, I’ve never actually cut in one of these “happy flashes” but the mere thought is really confusing for me. I don’t like it at all.

To all those who are familiar with self-harm: Do you know that too? I’ve never read about it so I’m really interested in other peoples’ experiences here.

Happy, cut-free day to all of you 🙂

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6 thoughts on “Cutting due to happiness?!?!?!

  1. Hey! Just stumbled past this as i’m drinking my morning coffee at school. Unfortunately I think this is something a lot of us can relate to – cutting, whether backed by positive or negative emotions in the moment, produces a sort of otherworldly high, yeah? On bad days this is what a lot of people turn to but I think it makes sense to do it even on days that weren’t so bad… After all, topping a good day off with an endorphin rush… Seems fairly logical/plausible to me. I have some personal experience being confused about why I had urges even when I was having my best days, but what i’m getting at is this: addicts of any kind (drugs, alcohol, self harm etc) will use on their worst days and probably even on their good days. Urges are to be expected and (hopefully) dealt with in the healthiest/ most appropriate manner. Idk if this helped but i’m still waking up haha, so thanks for posting and have a splendid rest of the day!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Good morning, welcome, thanks for your comment and I hope you had the most delicious coffee 🙂
      You’re probably right, I haven’t seen it from that point of view although I’ve often compared self-harm to other addictions in the past. I guess we use it in order to cope with intense feelings, no matter if they’re good or bad….
      Anyway, I’m glad you stopped by and hope you enjoyed reading, it was definitely inspiring to read your comment 🙂
      Good day to you!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I often crave being zoned out and numb. I want to throw up or carve something into my thigh, maybe even something happy. Possible strong positive emotions are scary because they don’t last. So why not balance yourself out with a little cutting. IDK, nothing makes sense and I’m pretty sure I’m going crazy too. 💜

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m pretty sure everyone’s a litlle crazy so never mind that and thanks for the comment 😉
      It’s interesting you’re saying that you actually crave going numb…for me, being numb or empty or whatever you might call it is the most scary thing of all…
      Anyway, take care!

      Like

  3. It sounds like a sort of association. Like maybe how people with depression find it easier being sad because sometimes familiarity is less scary? Maybe it’s similar – cutting is a familiar reaction – to anything.

    Liked by 1 person

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