The inner child

…I’ve wanted to write about that topic for quite a while now. My inner child was an important topic in my therapy and got even more important since I stopped seeing my therapist. But for starters: What is an inner child?

It is a sort of metaphor for the childlike part in all of us, the child we once were and that doesn’t die as soon as we grow up (although many of us lock it into a dark basement and don’t have room for it in the “grown-up” world). It is the part of us that still loves marbles and plasticine and Peter Pan. The part that wants to be loved and for which we should be the parents we would have wanted. That doesn’t have anything to do with esoterism, it is just an image for something we all know. Even those who haven’t played or been carefree in ages would probably love to fly a kite or get a hug.

When I started to work with this image I soon realized that the inner child can be a very discomforting mirror. I saw how bad I treated myself, especially when it came to weaknesses or things that didn’t fit into our achievement-oriented world. It is not nice to wonder about stuff like: When you have laughed like a child for the last time…not because there was nothing to laugh about but because you don’t see little things like a child anymore or you don’t allow yourself to.

Not only do I have an inner child, I also have an inner safe place where i feel…well safe and where i don’t have to be afraid of anything. Like I said, this isn’t about esoterism, it is just an image that makes it easier to connect to a feeling I missed for a long time or get to know just now. It helps to listen to what my childlike part has to say – for example that making soap bubbles is much more fun than working double-shifts or that cuddly blankets are great…or that being irrational can sometimes be awesome as jumping into puddles is much more fun than hitting grumpy calves with a grumpy umbrella on a grumpy train. Through these imaginery child’s eyes I see why some things frightened me that I can’t see as an adult anymore. Taking the hands of this little version of myself helped me so much more than any serotonin reuptake inhibitor.

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